Heads Up

Live, Laugh, Love--You have one life so enjoy it!

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HEADS UP!
Live, Laugh, Love--You have one life so enjoy it!

Heads Up!
By Sue Stauffer

"Memory Enhancement Needed"

As I searched the house one last time in hopes of locating my lost eye glasses, I realized that I needed to do something to improve my seemingly failing memory. I am not certain that misplacing my eyeglasses fifty times a day is related to declining memory loss but it is definitely an annoyance. I think that missing eyeglasses is more closely related to my preoccupation with other things or absentmindedness but I know that my ability to remember certain things is becoming an increasing problem. There is an ancient system of memory enhancement called mnemonics that the Greek orators reportedly used to memorize speeches lasting seven hours or more. Modern devotees have adapted this to accomplish superhuman feats of recalling an entire telephone directory or reciting 30,000 digits of the number pi. My goals are much more modest. I want to remember where I put certain things and people’s names. So many times I’m in a situation when I run into a former customer or client and I recognize the face but can’t recall the name. With these goals in mind, I began my “memory improvement” plan following some of the basic precepts of mnemonics. I started with the FIG system which stands for file, image, glue. The first step is to create a mental file in your brain where you can later store sequential information. I learned that one of the critical features in memory is what happens in the few seconds when an experience occurs. If one doesn’t do something with that information quickly, there is little likelihood that it will be remembered later. Doing “something” means thinking about the meaning of the event and relating it to other information and experiences you already have stored. Association with something pleasant or creating a mental image relating to the information is helpful especially when trying to remember the name of the person to whom you have just been introduced. For example, If you meet a woman dressed in blue whose name is Alice, picture “Alice Blue Gown” in your mind and you will probably remember her name ten minutes later as “Alice.” Mental imaging and association are the keys. Memory problems become more noticeable beginning in the 40’s and continue to occur decade by decade. There is no cliff just a slippery slope of gradual decline. Here are some quick tricks I have been using to help my memory. 1. Play the name game. When you meet someone, repeat the name saying it back two or three times. 2. Create an association. If you need to remember to take medication every night before going to bed, tell yourself to do it after you brush your teeth—not at a certain time but after a routine action. 3. Keep it short. Short study sessions to learn something new work better. Break down the information into 10 minute intervals and then review the previous information before learning something new. 4. Know your ABC’s. Memory blocks are normal due to the complex network of memory connections that build up over a lifetime. Chances are the information you want to remember is in your brain. If you can’t remember a name or a place, try running through the alphabet. It can help to get the first letter and that can trigger the rest. 5. Make a connection. Visual triggers using random nouns can also be helpful. Microphone can stand for the name Mike, toilet for John, magic marker for Mark, hotdog for Frank and so on. I think the next time I meet someone named Rob, I’ll try looking at him as a burglar or Robin Hood. Perhaps if I keep exercising your mind through reading, puzzles, stimulating intellectual pursuit and these memory tricks I can keep my brain vibrant and my memory improving. In studies of aging animals, cognitive stimulation has shown to cause new connections to sprout between neurons. Research suggests the same is true in humans so stay active mentally and physically. I would hate to lose the recall of some of the best and most wonderful moments in my life. I want to hold on to these remembrances always so I will try almost anything to keep my memory into old age. Perhaps these exercises will also help me locate my eyeglasses.

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Heads Up!
By Sue Stauffer

“Appreciation?”

There’s a song titled "Thank God for Dirty Dishes" that makes the point that if you’re lucky to have enough food to make dirty dishes, you should be grateful. The same principal could be applied to being thankful you own a home instead of complaining about property taxes or cursing the heavy traffic, the long lines, the government, the weather, etc. Expressing appreciation for what we have isn’t always that easy to remember to do. I recently received an email about heaven. It described what the angels were doing and how they were answering peoples prayer requests. There were lots of requests coming in so most of the angels were bustling about keeping busy granting them. One angel was not busy at all. When asked why she didn’t have much to do, she replied, “We get a great many requests for help but my job is to receive the ‘thank you’s’ and we don’t receive many.” This made me stop and think about all the blessings I have in my life and I vowed to begin to be more appreciative. Gratitude is so much more that basic politeness like saying a simple “thank you” and acknowledging when someone does something nice for you. Being truly thankful is a real feeling of deep psychological gratitude whether you believe that your good fortune is the product of your efforts, basic talents, good fortune, or a gift from God. We seldom take the time or truly make the effort to think about our appreciation for our many blessings. I was amazed at how good it makes me feel to stop and reflect on my blessings and good fortune every day. When I think about what is happening in other parts of our world with rapid disease, poverty, starvation, and devastation, we have little to complain about by comparison. Yes, we are having some difficult times economically right now, but this country also has the capability to overcome our problems and continue to thrive. We have protected rights that enable us to enjoy free speech, free religion, and the right to vote for our government representatives. We live in a democracy for which we should all be appreciative every day. There is an old proverb that says, “If you never learn the language of gratitude, you’ll never be on speaking terms with happiness.” It is so true. The more I stop to appreciate both the big and little things I enjoy on a daily basis, the happier and more satisfied I feel. It is a new found sense of well-being and peace. I highly recommend the practice of “daily appreciation.” It seems to work very well.

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Head’s Up!
By Sue Stauffer

“Staying At the Fabulous Fairmont!”

My husband and I recently attended a wedding in Newport Beach, California and decided to spend the night at the Fairmont Hotel where the groom had arranged a block of rooms for out-of-town guests. Not having been to Newport Beach for several years, I decided to program my GPS system to assist with the hotel location, but when the GPS voice announced “you have reached your destination,” there was no hotel in site. We drove around again and again and still couldn’t see a sign for the hotel. My husband and I were getting frustrated and tempers were heating up. This was not a good way to go to a wedding. I was driving and finally turned into what looked to be an office building and low and behold, there was the hotel! Amazing! We parked and went in to register and head up to our room to dress for the wedding. The front desk was what every front desk should be-polite, efficient and friendly. On the way to our room, we decided to check with the concierge desk to get directions to the site for the wedding. Again, we were pleased with our reception and he even printed out Google directions for us. From the instructions, it appeared that the wedding was very close by so we took our time getting ready. But things are not always as them seem or in this case, where they seem. We headed for the wedding, planning on arriving early but when we drove to the address from Google, there was no such street address. We drove around the block again but still no sign of the American Legend building, the address or the wedding. Then my husband remembered he had been to the American Legend location long ago with a friend and the location we were seeking was on the water and on the same named street. A traffic jam greeted us when we headed to the new location as it was a sunny Saturday afternoon and people were coming and going to the beach. We were late! When we pulled up the American Legend building, there were lots of people standing out in front as many other guests had made the same mistake with the Google directions so everything was delayed. The wedding was lovely and fun and we had no problem heading back to the hotel for a good night’s rest after enjoying the celebration. We relished the comfort of our lovely room with a wide screen televison, a good shower and an overstuffed chair that was perfect for reading. When we finally decided to go to bed, we had no idea what a truly great experience awaited us. The bed was pure heaven! The bedding was wonderfully elegant as only the Fairmont offers but the mattress, oh the mattress, was the most comfortable I have ever slept on. It was Simmons Empyrean pillow top, Triton High…Wow! What a great sleep!! You can bet I will be shopping for that Simmons Empyrean pillow top mattress for home! From checking in to the Fairmont to checking out and heading for home, our experience at the fabulous Fairmont Newport Beach was excellent! I am confident that all the Fairmont hotels measure up to the same high standards of service, comfort, and ultimate customer satisfaction that we experienced.

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Heads Up!
By Sue Stauffer

“Learning Lessons From Life’s Struggles”

Every parent wrestles with the tough decisions that they often face while raising their children. It is our instinct to always protect our children from anything that could cause them discomfort, pain or stress but this is not always the best choice. Growing up is a process that involves making choices, taking risks, and learning from decisions. I know of no child who has ever passed through the early years without facing some painful experiences both physical and psychological. The old saying that “no pain, no gain,” seems to apply to the developmental process. I am not advocating that parents shouldn’t protect their children from real harm, but I do believe that children, especially teenagers, should understand that consequences result from the choices they make and be allowed to face the results of their decisions. There's a parable about a young mother who discovered a butterfly struggling mightily to escape its cocoon through a tiny opening at the top. She became concerned when the creature seemed to give up after making no progress. Certain that the butterfly wouldn't make it out without help, the well-meaning mother enlarged the hole slightly. On its next try, the butterfly wriggled out easily. But the mother’s joy turned to horror when she saw its wings were shriveled and useless. Her well-intentioned intervention had turned out badly because it interrupted a natural process. Forcing the butterfly to squeeze though a small opening is nature's way of assuring that blood from the creature's body is pushed into the wings. By making it easier, she deprived the butterfly of strong wings.
If a healthy adult is to emerge from childhood, parents must allow, even encourage, their children to struggle, make mistakes, learn from them and pay a price for bad judgments and conduct. But being overprotective can itself inflict damage. Adversity is not always an enemy. It's often teaching that helps a young person develop wings strengthened by self confidence and self-reliance. Helen Keller once said, "Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired and success achieved." We need to allow our children to experience all aspects of their lives and find out how to make good decisions, and wise choices so that they can become adults whose values dictate their behaviors.
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Heads Up!
By Sue Stauffer

"Have We Become Insensitive to Violence?"

I love to go to the theater. My husband and I have season tickets to several of the theater venues in Los Angeles and always enjoy attending the different productions. Last week we saw South Pacific which was a wonderful revival of the popular musical about the navy in World War II. We came out of the theater humming the songs feeling very happy that we had attended this wonderful musical performance. However, the previous week, we did not have such an enjoyable experience at the Mark Taper Forum. The play they presented was titled the Lieutenant of Inishmore. It was about the very bloody Irish revolution in 1993. Billed as a “black comedy,” it was indeed “black!” But in my mind definitely not a comedy. The play opens with a dead cat lying on a table with its brains coming out. This supposedly was the cat belonging to the infamous Irish revolutionary killer, Padraic who would go crazy if anything happened to his cat, “Wee Thomas.” The second scene finds Padraic torturing James who is hanging by one leg upside down while having his toenails pulled out in a bloody manner. The first act continues with more acts of violence from a girl who shoots out the eyes of cattle, to the killing of three men who are hoping to kill Padraic, and another cat shot to death. Act II opens with bodies and blood covering the stage as two of the other characters are sawing off the heads, arms and legs of three corpses while making stupid insidious comments. There is a large amount of stage blood spraying from the fake corpses and the scene is ghastly and very gory. I could not believe that people in the audience found this hysterical and were laughing at the carnage and the comments. I got up and walked out totally appalled that people have become so insensitive to violence! I was especially surprised since our country is fighting a war with thousands of young men and women living and fighting in harms way on a daily basis and exposed to acts of real violence and danger every day. They do this for the righteous cause of protecting American rights and freedom and while keeping our country free from invasion and harm. I am greatly disappointed in the public reaction and seemingly encouragement of acceptance of violence as a means of entertainment and even humor. I don’t understand why values have deteriorated to such an extent that people can be amused by bloody killings and torture. It is time that we react negatively to all entertainment-theater, movies, video games, television, and sporting events that perpetrate violence and seriously examine what value, if any, that it has for society. I believe that most people, I hope anyway, would prefer to leave an entertainment venue with an uplifted feeling rather than a negative reaction. We as a nation should abhor violence of any kind and not support anything that encourages brutality. Why The Lieutenant of Inishmore received awards and positive reviews is beyond my comprehension as I think it speaks to the lowest level of human nature-mans inhumanity to man.

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